The F Word
By Harley Vannurden
Whether you’re into thongs or balloons, everyone has something they find themselves inexplicably sexually attracted to. A fetish is a strong link between one’s sexual gratification and a particular object or body part. A misunderstanding of it’s breadth and boundaries has stigmatized fetishism. However, the characterization of fetishism as a psychological disorder is up for debate.
To understand fetishism, we must first understand paraphilias. Paraphilia is a condition characterized by abnormal sexual desires, typically involving extreme or dangerous activities. Paraphilias are a category including conditions such as pedophilia, exhibitionism, frotteurism, sadomasochism, and voyeurism, alongside fetishism. The distinction between fetishism and most other paraphilias is that they often include participation of an unwilling person who hasn’t given their consent to be involved. Fetishism however, focuses primarily on objects, and non-consent isn’t an integral part of an act of fetishism. The association of fetishes with other paraphilias is a reason why fetishism is highly stigmatized. For example, pedophilia is sexual interaction with children. Exhibitionism is the exposure of one’s genitals to an unsuspecting person. Frotteurism is the act of touching or rubbing one's genitals up against a non-consenting person in a sexual manner. Sadism is gaining sexual gratification from inflicting suffering on others. Voyeurism is the practice of gaining sexual pleasure from watching others when they’re naked or engaged in sexual activity. In contrast, popular fetish interests include feet, underwear, and hair. People often fear what they don’t understand, including other’s sexual interests. However, fetishists may find pleasure in giving into a desire for something that is considered taboo.
There is no definitive origin for fetishes, although we know they typically first manifest during puberty. One theory is that fetishes come from a repeated sexual association with the fetishized concept. As the individual continually reverts back to their fetish for sexual gratification, the association strengthens and the fetish becomes ingrained in their sexual psyche. Paraphilias, including fetishism, are more prominent in men than women. Approximately 50% of men and 40% of women regularly engage in or are aroused by one or more paraphilias. Additionally, we know being a witness or victim of inappropriate sexual behavior as a child is a predisposing factor for the development of fetishism. With reinforcement and repetition, children may adopt a fetish for aspects of the behaviors they witnessed. With so many people having some kind of paraphilic interest, it’s important to consider whether it should be classified as a disorder.
Fetishes are quite common, and being deemed a disorder paints them as bad or wrong. When critically thinking about the classification of paraphilias as disorders, it’s important to consider whether the paraphilia has a negative impact on oneself or others. “The DSM-5 diagnostic criteria for paraphilia state that the patient must have experienced intense and recurrent sexual arousal from deviant fantasies for at least six months and must have acted on these impulses. A paraphilia becomes a pathology, or a paraphilic disorder, only when this behavior causes significant distress and impairment of functioning to the individual or if the paraphilia involves personal harm or risk of harm to others”. I feel that it’s reasonable to classify paraphilias that revolve around a non-consenting partner in any regard as a disorder, because it’s harmful to society. Most fetishes however, revolving around objects or a specific body part, don’t cause individuals to harm others in search of sexual gratification. “Since fetishes occur in many normally developing individuals, a diagnosis of fetishistic disorder is only given if there is accompanying personal distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning as a result of the fetish. People who identify as fetishists but don’t report associated clinical impairment would be considered to have a fetish but not fetishistic disorder” Psych Today. The way society looks at fetishism is certain to cause some cognitive dissonance, but if it’s not harming anyone, it is possible to embrace a fetish in a healthy way. However, if it’s doing damage to themselves or others, treatment is the next step in caring for the good of society.
If one’s paraphilia poses a potential threat to society, the main form of treatment is therapy. In treating paraphilias, it should be noted that most people with a paraphilic tendency don’t seek treatment unless they have offended and are required to go through treatment. Therapies attempt to disconnect the object of paraphilias with the sexual pleasure one gains from it. Currently, behavioral, hypnosis and psychoanalysis therapies are utilized to understand the desire and reframe it in a more healthy way. Behavioral therapy works to identify sexual tendencies, alter behavior, and understand one’s sexual triggers. Hypnosis therapy uses relaxation and mindfulness techniques to help a person hyper-focus, leading to more clarity about their mindset and how to change. Psychoanalysis therapy attempts to uncover and examine unconscious thoughts to give an individual greater understanding of themselves, which can lead to understanding how to alter one’s thought processes.
Empathy training is another important tool in treating harmful paraphilias in order to help offenders understand why their disorder is harmful to others. This understanding leads to a greater willingness to change, teaching that it’s not just for the good of themselves, but for everyone they interact with. Although therapies are considered the most effective treatment at this time, drugs are also being explored as an option for treating harmful sexual tendencies. The objective is to find ways to block sexual desire in order to limit offensive actions taken to satiate arousal. To clarify, not all paraphilias are harmful, and most fetishes are harmless.
Fetishism is an integral part of everyday life, whether we acknowledge it or not. It’s important to understand that they’re not as scary or harmful as they’re made out to be, but rather live in the shadow of other inherently harmful paraphilias such as pedophilia and frotteurism. Such paraphilias require treatment, and new treatments are being developed alongside known therapies. Distinguishing and treating harmful paraphilias is important for the health of our society. Practice consensual, safe sex.
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